It's your night out. Get your hair did, put your face on, and pick out the right outfit. Time to find yourself a man who will keep the drinks coming. You open the doors and do your super model strut; Tyra Banks eat your heart out. And you know you're looking good...
You get your drink and put your radar on, how can any man resist you?
The only problem is the only thing men want to buy you is a full length mirror.
Yes, skin usually equals a man's attention; that's why the Sports Illustrated Swim Suit Edition is so popular.But, let's get real here, there's only one Tyra Banks in the world, and most of us will never look like her. So, why would we think wearing a super model size would ever get us free drinks?
"That lady" happens way too often at the bar. When she thinks her sexy outfit is exuding pure sex, but it exudes desperation/craziness.
I feel like as a woman, it is much easier to get a man to get what you want, versus a man to find a woman to get what he wants. So, is it necessary to try that hard?
Not only are muffin tops offenders, but I love when a woman sits down and her ENTIRE thong is hanging out of their pants. Don't you feel the draft? I'd assume your cheeks might be a little chilly... And as a bartender, it's not really my job to tell you that you are flashing the innocent bystanders, but I really, really want to.
There are three things on a check list that can help you identify whether you are an offender:
1) Are people around you often in the mood for muffins or baked goods when you are around?
2) Do people often ask if you're a cat owner, without knowing anything else about you?
3)Are you closer to getting your AARP card than your driver's license and shop in the Junior's Dept.? or you borrow your teenage daughter's clothes, because you're the same size?
If you've answered yes to any of these, please, please, please, look at this picture again and take it all in, then cover it all up. Although I see crazy things at a bar, some can be avoided.
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